Getting ready to fly back. Back to Portland. Like I do every year, at least once. It's a pilgrimage of sorts. I return to remind myself why I'm in NYC. Although lately Portland is pulling me with more strength. Partly its the Wee Bub and all the questions that come with being a parent. Where will our family thrive more? Where will my child be the happiest? Where will I be the happiest so that I can be a better parent? Although its not about happiness per se--more a question of opportunity and fulfillment and creating a life that will model to the Bub how good life can be.
Regardless of the philosophical aspects of the journey I'm flying tomorrow night with the Bub and a head cold. Flying becomes all together different with a child. I have to wonder if an extra seat will be available for his car seat or if we'll be sharing a seat for the 5+ hours. I have to ask how I will reach the gate with Bub, stroller, car seat, diaper bag, cameras that can not be checked and dinner to be eaten while waiting for our long journey. I've been told by the airline that my spouse can not accompany me to the gate, but that an airport employee will help me. That's all well and good for getting us from point A to B, but what about the in-betweens. Say I have to change the Bub's diaper or use the bathroom myself. hmmm. Then I'll have to schlep everything with me because we all know nothing can be left unattended. Ugh! Who wants to think about this stuff? I suppose I could choose not to concern myself with all the questions and wing it......Naaaah. Creating all the scenarios is just what I do.
So tomorrow I'll fly and we'll see if my planning pays off or if none of it mattered in the slightest.
